Therapy grounded in real inner work and genuine human connection.
Summer is in full swing and sleepovers can become a big topic for families. So let’s talk about some things to consider before sending your kid on a sleepover, what to consider if you don’t, or they have challenges around sleepovers. Sleepovers can be beneficial …
Your approach to your child’s therapy has a significant impact on the success of the outcome of your investment in therapy. Let’s talk about a few ways you can really amplify that investment and ways that you might inadvertently diminish the investment. Let’s start with …
If your child is having consistent emotional, behavioral, or social challenges that interfere with their daily life, well-being, or development then it may be time to look into getting some professional help for them.
As a concerned parent you will want to do some research to see what is best for your child. So let’s talk about what’s more helpful, tap outs or therapy?
Tap outs is an online mental wellness program that teaches emotional skills, confidence, growth mindsets, resilience and healthy habits, so that kids are prepared to deal with life’s challenges. There is an element of fun in the tap outs program that makes it appealing to kids such as videos, games and rewards.
“Once the fun and excitement is established, we found kids to be much more receptive to new learnings and willing to apply those to real life.” (https://help.tapouts.com/en-us/knowledge-base/what-tapouts-is)
The program is designed for kids ages 4-16. Groups of 8-10 kids (grouped by age) meet online for 30 minutes each week and they are led by a coach. Each week a new learning outcome is introduced and there is discussion and learning that is done in a fun way to keep them engaged.
Being involved in a group that includes other kids who have similar challenges can help your child feel like they are not alone or really normalize challenges. This can make it easier for them to express their feelings and want to participate.
There is also a points system that encourages participation and they can cash in their points for rewards like gifts cards, games, and other prizes. This positive reinforcement is typically something that kids respond well to. So they may be more motivated and less resistant than they would be towards therapy.
This type of program can be very helpful for kids because it’s a relaxed environment where they can connect with other kids and have fun.
AND. This is really great for creating a baseline of skills for your child. They will have some foundational knowledge and experience that support their experience in therapy if it comes to a time when they would benefit from therapy.
Tap outs is not recommended if you have some more intense things happening emotionally. For example: if your child is experiencing ongoing social or school difficulties, if they’ve been through or are going through an emotionally intense experience at home or they’ve experienced trauma. If any of these things are happening and you want to combine tap outs and therapy, great! But you don’t want to put a bandaid on something that needs professional attention, you know?
Therapy builds emotional awareness to help kids identify and express feelings like anger, sadness, fear, or frustration and sometimes this is most effective in an environment that is private and individualized.
A therapist can see beyond the presenting behaviors and get to underlying causes so there can be healing, learning to emotionally regulate during intense experiences at home, at school or with friends.
Therapists can pick up on subtle cues and read the body language of the child after getting to know them and this is helpful, especially if they have a hard time verbally expressing their feelings.
When a kid is in therapy, family involvement is encouraged. This is beneficial as it improves parent-child communication, helps parents understand what the child is experiencing, and gives them tools to address behaviors at home and provide effective discipline. In a past blog we talked about what to expect when your child is in therapy, you can read that HERE.
There is no clear cut answer to the question, “What’s more helpful? Tap outs or therapy?” because it all depends on the kid and the situation. You have to look at their personality and what specific challenges they are facing,so that you can make the best decision for them.
If you are ready to look into what is best for your child so that you can begin managing their mental health, contact us, we can help you get started.
I know it seems counter intuitive, but summer is actually the ideal time for your kids to start therapy. When you or your kids are experiencing the stress of school, you might feel the urgency to find a therapist to help with that stress. And …
If your kid is angry, more than likely there is something deeper going on. Anger is usually a reaction to other feelings, what you see may look like anger, but in reality, that emotion is secondary to what is really happening inside of them. So …
Extra-curricular activities like sports and art classes are important for kids. They promote skill development, socialization, regulating energy levels, and physical health. But, when you’re trying to set up your kids’ after school schedule, there’s a reason not to lump therapy in with art and sports. It’s in its own category.
Let’s talk about how it is different.
For example, if your child is struggling with anxiety (regular anxiety, performance anxiety or social anxiety), being in extracurricular activities is going to exacerbate the issue if they are not learning the skills to be with and overcome the anxiety that comes up in those after school activities.
“While goal oriented activities can help a child develop certain skills, when those skills are scrutinized by parents, coaches or teachers, it can lead to self esteem issues, stress, and anxiety. This is especially true around the age of 12 when kids start to compare themselves to their peers in the formation of identity and self concept.” (Wijkstrom, Stephanie. “Signs Your Child Is Involved in Too Many Extracurricular Activities.” Counseling and Wellness Center of Pittsburg. October 5, 2022. www.counselingwellnesspgh.com/signs-your-child-is-involved-in-too-many-extracurricular-activities/)
While most extracurricular activities are fun and kids are excited about participating in them, they can still trigger stress, big feelings or overwhelm for a kid. If they are already working on identifying the emotions associated with their general anxieties and developing coping skills to address them, then they can apply them in all areas of their life whether it be family, school, friends or even extracurricular activities. This can help them get more out of those activities and find a sport or activity that they can thrive in.
We see parents pull kids from therapy thinking that the child doesn’t care. Kids might not always tell you that they do, because they want to please you or might not be fully aware of what’s happening in therapy. If you want therapy to be a safe place for your kid to work through things, you have to make sure it’s reliably available.
Therapy can be hard for kids because their therapist will push them to help them grow. If it’s intermittently available, your kid won’t open up enough to get the support they need. Consistency allows them to develop trust and build a relationship with their therapist.
“The key here is being consistent; if you want change, you must be consistent. Consistency essentially means sticking to the plan and not skipping (or over-doing) something.” (Barbash, Elyssa. “STOP CANCELING YOUR THERAPY APPOINTMENTS! – THAT IS, IF YOU WANT REAL CHANGE IN YOUR LIFE.” Tampa Therapy. June 4, 2017. www.tampatherapy.com/2017/06/04/12338/)
This happens a lot: people don’t think they have time for therapy or they don’t feel like going. This is the best time to go. Where else in life can you take a pause from the outside world to reflect, be seen and gather yourself? There are no distractions. Sometimes it’s the exact thing you need, especially when you don’t feel like it.
If you act like it isn’t a big deal to cancel appointments because something else comes up or because you want to use that time to get other things checked off your to-do list, then you are showing your kid that therapy is not a priority. Talk with them about the benefits of therapy and how important it is to keep it up, even when it feels hard or when it doesn’t feel like you have time for it.
Modeling this behavior in your own life as a parent, and prioritizing your own mental health and self-care, is another way you can emphasize the importance of sticking with it.
It’s true, therapy is an ‘extra’ event that you have to factor into your schedule, however, it’s very different from a typical extracurricular activity. It’s not a luxury or something to be used as a reward; it may be a necessity for your kid’s mental and emotional well-being. (Barbash, Elyssa. “GETTING AWAY FROM THE “THERAPY IS A LUXURY” MENTALITY.” Tampa Therapy. April 25, 2017. www.tampatherapy.com/2017/04/25/getting-away-from-the-therapy-is-a-luxury-mentality/)
You’ve probably heard before that things get worse before they get better when you start therapy. For adults, the reason is because you start to open your eyes to things you might not have been aware of in your life and in your past. For …
It’s super easy to get pulled into power struggles with your kids and sometimes it doesn’t seem too obvious until you’re at your limits. So let’s take a look at what this looks like and how to step out of it. What is a power …
Social media, whether we like it or not, has an impact on the therapy world. In therapy, we often educate our clients about mental health, family dynamics, and emotional wellness. We normalize and validate experiences to create a platform for the work you come to therapy to do. Now a lot of that is also happening on social media, so that first part of creating a platform for the work starts happening outside of sessions or before you even start therapy. This can really add to the efficiency of therapy.
What’s helpful is when clients get high quality information and bring questions about it to session so we can work with you on unpacking how that information does or doesn’t apply to you and your family.
These are the top 3 Instagram accounts we refer clients to:
We love this account because there is high quality comprehensive information about trauma, family dynamics, relationships, emotional and nervous system regulation. In addition to sharing helpful information on her account, Dr. Nicole LePera also has a podcast, YouTube channel, blog and a book that may be very helpful for our clients.
This account curates excellent information from a number of different accounts that speak to body based therapies and information about self regulation, emotional health and healing trauma. Here you will find information about events and trainings, as well as helpful tips about how to cope using somatic experiencing techniques.
There is a lot of information out there on parenting and the best sources are going to be ones that align with your parenting philosophy and your child’s temperament. But don’t stress… you don’t have to know what your “parenting philosophy” is, simply consider how posts generally align with what feels right to you. It’s OK for some ideas to feel activating at first, sometimes that means this is challenging and updating your beliefs. However, if everything feels like it has a rub for you, it might not be aligned for you and your family and that’s OK!
We love this one in particular because it provides helpful updates to some old school parenting techniques. Kristin (a parent coach), and Deena (child therapist/parent coach) are the two ladies behind this account and they are not only experts in their field, they are real moms dealing with the same real issues as every other parent. They are very relatable and help parents feel like they are not alone with their parenting struggles.
There will always be accounts on social media that share inaccurate information when it comes to mental health, so we encourage our clients to exercise caution when going online for guidance and help. That is why we are quick to share accounts that we find, and follow ourselves, that share quality, relevant information that can be helpful.
Do you have any end of the year rituals? A way to gather your experiences, crystallize your memories, celebrate milestones and integrate your growth? If you don’t or you are looking for ways to enhance your end of year reflections, we have a couple of …