Therapy grounded in real inner work and genuine human connection.
As a parent, you might notice a lot more irritability, defiance, or meltdowns with your tween, which can be really disruptive. In dealing with that disruption, and everything that triggers for everyone else in your house, it’s hard to remember that those mood swings and …
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Attending family therapy with your parents as an adult can bring up a lot of emotions. You might feel hopeful, anxious, or maybe even resistant. Obviously as an adult, you’re no longer a child under their care, but you’re still their kid. But you still want them to be your parent. So, it’s weird and you might wonder if therapy will actually help. All of these feelings and thoughts are valid, so let’s get into what you can expect.
The way you grow up continues to influence you as an adult because it has shaped how you see yourself, how you relate to others, and how you handle conflict. If you’re choosing to go to therapy with your parents it should not be to place blame on them and how they raised you, but to process unresolved feelings, and to find healthier ways of relating to them now that you’re an adult.
Family therapy will not be a quick fix because change takes time. It might feel like the progress is slow but it will be worth it. You will want to be clear with each other, prior to starting therapy, what your goals are.
Do you want to understand each other better, or decrease the tension that you feel when you are together? Or maybe there are other things you want to get out of it, but clarifying that on the front end will be helpful.
Go into it with an open mind. Be prepared to listen and try to understand where everyone is coming from. This doesn’t mean that you allow your parents to minimize your feelings or experiences, you can be open to their truth while still holding onto yours.
Remember that you are an adult now, your parents do not have any authority over you, how you feel, or decisions you make. Attending therapy with them does not mean you are returning to a parent-child dynamic, you are all adults and it takes some shifting to be able to relate as adults..
A therapist’s office is a neutral space, so unlike when you were younger and you were living under your parents’ roof and their rules, you can be assured that you are in a space where everyone’s voice matters. The therapist will guide your conversations so no one dominates and everyone feels heard.
Every family communicates differently so one of the topics of discussion will likely be about your family’s communication style. This might include looking at how your parents communicated with you when you were younger and how you communicate with each other now. This, along with some reflections from the therapist can give some insight into your relationship and how it can be improved. Learning communication skills that work for your family in therapy can help you, as a family, work through issues on your own, outside of therapy.
It’s common for situations and emotions from the past to come up in therapy. Don’t consider this a step backwards, even if you thought everyone had moved on from the situation, therapy is a good place to really work through it.
If you have lingering feelings of hurt or resentment, it’s best to let your therapist guide you through it so you can truly heal. It’s important to work through things that have happened in the past but you will want to move towards focusing on the present and how you can relate to each other now so that you have supportive healthy relationships.
You might think that you knew what your parents were thinking or going through when you were younger, and that has shaped how you see them and connect with them. But in therapy you will get to hear your parents share their experiences from their perspective which is one you might not have heard before. A lot of things can come to light that makes you see them differently , which can bring new empathy. You may not agree with them but you may be able to relate more to how and why they have made certain decisions or behaved a certain way.
“As parents and adult children work through old hurts, enter into more appropriate roles, manage changes, and communicate effectively, they build stronger connections.” (Epstein, Sarah. “6 Ways Family Therapy Can Help Adult Children and Parents.” Psychology Today. February 21, 2028. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/between-the-generations/202301/6-ways-family-therapy-can-help-adult-children-and-parents.)
In a past blog we discussed how going to therapy isn’t about fixing you but it is “… a place to build a positive relationship with yourself so that you can establish positive relationships with others and the world around you.” This also holds true when it comes to family therapy and it’s a good place to start a more positive journey.
Going to family therapy with your parents as an adult is a big step forward and that will impact a lot of other relationships in your life now and in the future.
There will be some uncomfortable moments but it shows that you value the connection you have with them and want to have more positive interactions with them in the future. Taking small steps together can add up to significant changes that lead to growth and healthier relationships with the people you love.
If you are considering taking the next step to go to family therapy with your parents as an adult, contact us, we can help.
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ChatGPT can be a helpful tool for basic emotional support when you need a quick response, but it is not a good long term substitute for professional therapy…even though Chat’s answers are sometimes surprisingly insightful. Let’s talk about the benefits of talking with ChatGPT and the problems and/or risks.
If you experience an intense emotional situation and you don’t have someone to talk to and you aren’t currently set up with a therapist, turning to ChatGPT is always available at no cost. Because it’s so easy to access, you can quickly release your feelings which can relieve emotional distress.
Sometimes you may need a sounding board to talk through situations or decisions and ChatGPT can help you organize your thoughts and think through various perspectives. This may be all you need to get through what you are facing. And bots don’t judge you so it feels safe.
It’s also easy to get basic guidance and support by giving you information that you may need or helping you define something that you don’t have all the facts on. Similar to a Google search, ChatGPT can give you basic strategies and ideas for coping skills that you can use to address your problems.
One of the vital elements of what makes therapy so effective is the relationship that is built between a patient and a therapist, and ChatGPT cannot do this.
“Across the different therapeutic modalities, there is a consistent theme of being in a relationship with another person and making psychological contact.”
(Priestly, Stephanie. “Why Using ChatGPT as Therapy Is Dangerous.” Medium. April 7, 2023. https://medium.com/@stephanielouisepriestley/why-using-chatgpt-as-therapy-is-dangerous-e8e2f4678e7e)
The trust that is built and the connection that is formed is a basic human need that we all need. All therapists will tell you that the therapeutic interventions they make are some of the least important parts of therapy. It’s the connection between the therapist and client, the shift in facial expression the therapist recognizes, the experience of a therapist working with people’s internal worlds everyday that can pinpoint something AI cannot see.
Your therapist is a mirror, helping you to see what you can’t. Ai has information, it can reflect back the information you give it, which can be super helpful if you need to talk something out.
But you do have to ask it for alternative perspectives, otherwise, it will reflect back and validate only your experience, which is valuable, but doesn’t reliably create progress.
Another concern is the lack of privacy when sharing personal information. Anytime you share your info online you are taking a chance that it is not kept secure.
“HIPAA (Health Insurance Portability and Accountability Act) doesn’t apply to ChatGPT because it deals specifically with the electronic transmission of healthcare information related to insurance. ChatGPT has nothin’ to do with insurance, so it doesn’t apply.”
(Jancer, Matt. “Don’t Use ChatGPT as Your Therapist—Unless You Want Your Private Information Leaked.” Vice. July 30, 2025. https://www.vice.com/en/article/sam-altman-comments-chatgpt-therapy/)
So while it may be helpful and offer basic coping strategies and validation, ChatGPT is not equipped to support you in the way a human therapist with training and experience can,
It may be helpful between therapy sessions to help you think through things, problem solve or to vent your thoughts and emotions, but establishing a human connection with a trained professional is an investment that will pay dividends for a lifetime. For that to happen, find the right therapist. We wrote a blog about that here.
If you are ready to take the step to begin therapy and so that you can make a positive impact on your mental health, contact us, we are here to help.
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Summer is in full swing and sleepovers can become a big topic for families. So let’s talk about some things to consider before sending your kid on a sleepover, what to consider if you don’t, or they have challenges around sleepovers.
Sleepovers can be beneficial for kids and we know they can bring up anxiety for you and for them. Let’s talk this through so you can land on what feels right for you and your kiddo.
When your child attends a sleepover they are able to practice independence since they are outside of their normal environment and away from home. It also gives them some exposure to other family dynamics, cultures and routines; they get to see that everyone and every environment is not exactly the same as theirs and this can help them become more adaptable.
“A sleepover at someone else’s house can also be an insightful opportunity for kids to see how another family operates. This may help them value what makes families different and what they love about their own family.” (Gwilliam, Ellie. “Should my Child go on a Sleepover?” Parenting Place. https://parentingplace.nz/resources/should-my-child-go-on-a-sleepover)
Interacting with friends outside of their structured school or sports type of activities is also helpful to strengthening their social skills. Being in a more relaxed environment can help them build closer bonds in friendships and practice different kinds of communication skills.
Because every family and every parent is different, there may be some things that you do not agree with going on in the household where the sleepover is being held. These can be minor things that you just don’t want your kid exposed to, or it could be major things that are a cause for concern.
One concern could be different levels of supervision. Some parents give their children more freedom or have more lax rules than you might be used to in your home, which can bring up anxiety for you and or your kid..
There may also be exposure to things that you don’t want your child to be around like different kinds of food or activities that you don’t normally do (maybe more screen time, different types of things they might have access to watch, older kids in the house, ect).
First, consider your relationship with the host family. How well do you know them? Are you familiar with their parenting style? Have you visited their home before and felt comfortable there, even though there might be some differences?
You may not know all the parents of your children’s friends, but getting to know them a little bit might help you get a sense of how comfortable you feel with allowing your child spend the night. Maybe you have their child over first, maybe you have a phone conversation with the parent and ask a few questions to get a sense of how their values and parenting style. This is not meant to come across as suspicious, rather: hey I’d love to connect so that everyone has a good time. It can also be a way for you to share anything special about your kid like food allergies or shyness or bossiness that can come up.
There should be open communication between you and the child’s parents and they should be willing to answer any questions you have before allowing your child to stay at their home. If they aren’t willing to do so, that’s probably a red flag.
Another thing to consider is who will be supervising and who are the other kids attending the sleepover. If your kid is younger you will want to make sure the parents are going to be present and supervising them the whole time. If you are not comfortable with them being left with an older sibling or other family member you need to communicate that.
How many other kids are attending and who they are can also be an important factor. Does your child get along with them? Could bullying or exclusion be a problem if other kids are also there?
There are also some things you need to consider about your child, like are they emotionally mature enough to be away from home. Some kids struggle with anxiety or home sickness and a sleepover can be a trigger. Ask yourself if they are ready for a sleepover and make sure they are not feeling pressured by their friend(s) to attend. If you think it’ll be a stretch, you might want to develop a plan so they can check in for reassurance.
Be prepared to deal with these types of situations by being available so they can call or text you if they need you, and you can also develop a plan of how they can let you know if they are uncomfortable or want to come home, like a code word.
You’ll also want to consider if your child has any medical needs/concerns like allergies, conditions or medications. This is not a deal breaker but definitely needs to be addressed with the parents at the host home.
While communication with the host parents is important, it’s also very important to communicate openly with your child if you allow them to attend a sleepover. This can include rules (for safety and behavior), personal boundaries, what a potentially dangerous situation can look like, and how to handle a situation that makes them feel uncomfortable. It also is helpful to include ways they can practice being a good guest For example: saying thank you, offering to help, asking permission, etc
“Just like the internet, sleepovers aren’t inherently bad, but they do pose inherent risks – and education can be key in prevention. When kids and parents know the dangers and warning signs, they can both be better equipped to stay safe.” (“7 Tips for a Safer Sleepover. Child Rescue Coalition.” https://childrescuecoalition.org/educations/7-tips-for-a-safer-sleepover/)
The decision to allow your child to have sleepovers or not is a personal one, and you have to do what feels right for your family. By considering all the risks and benefits and taking necessary precautions, you will be equipped to make an informed decision for your child’s well-being and safety.
If you are struggling with making this decision, knowing how to set your child up for success with things like sleepovers or other important parenting decisions, contact us, we are here to help!
Your approach to your child’s therapy has a significant impact on the success of the outcome of your investment in therapy. Let’s talk about a few ways you can really amplify that investment and ways that you might inadvertently diminish the investment. Let’s start with …