Therapy grounded in real inner work and genuine human connection.
As we discussed in our last post, there are some aspects of mental health being discussed on social media that we love; and there are some parts that are making things hard. We know there are a lot of conversations happening in households across the …
Information of all kinds is so much more accessible these days than it has been in the past. And, on the bright side, there has been a significant rise in information and awareness around mental health issues. After decades of shame and stigma surrounding mental …
A new year can mean new goals and new beginnings. One important goal is to find ways to support your mental health in the new year.
Some of the most common goals include making more money or losing weight; but often people don’t realize that supporting your mental health can have a positive impact on all of your other goals. You may see that making money and losing weight is easier when you have the peace and stability that devoting to your mental well-being can bring. This is true for lots of goals you set for yourself.
When you get together with family you usually learn something about yourself and/or them. It’s an environment that is different (sometimes in a good way and sometimes in a not so good way) so thoughts, feelings and behaviors come to the surface that otherwise may have stayed under wraps.
So what did you learn about yourself and your family over the holidays?
Take a minute to reflect on this. How do you see what you have learned impacting the way you do things in your life going forward, either for better or for worse?
Here’s an example:
My family always does things last minute and I see I do that too in my day to day life; like paying my bills or picking my kids up from school. I have identified it as a trait that is consistent in my family and something that I do as well.
But maybe I don’t want to continue this behavior because it leads to stress in my daily life. So how would I actually like to do it if I got to choose instead of falling back on old habits? Maybe I could begin setting a recurring reminder for bills or set up autopay; I could set a daily alarm to remind me when to leave to get the kids.
I have learned something about my family and myself that may be having a negative impact on my life, but going forward I am deciding to make a change for the better. This has a positive impact.
Speaking of positive impacts, we can actually schedule things that will help promote our mental well-being.
Most of us are guilty of staying in a state of busy-ness and we feel like something is wrong if we have downtime, or that downtime is a negative thing. So we then try to fill in any downtime with another task or activity.
But the truth is, downtime is essential to our mental health. We need time to rest, recharge and let our minds and bodies take a break.
When you don’t give your mind a chance to pause and refresh, it doesn’t work as efficiently. You might also be more likely to experience burnout and the health problems that go hand-in-hand with chronic stress. (Cleveland Clinic; Health Essentials – Why Downtime Is Essential for Brain Health)
One solution for this is to schedule your downtime. When I say schedule it I mean put it on the calendar and protect it at all costs! Do not allow yourself to schedule anything over it or postpone it (unless you have an emergency situation). Treating your downtime just like any other important appointment will help you establish boundaries and take back your time.
When you are looking ahead at your calendar for the new year, go ahead and schedule vacation time and downtime. When you have something to look forward to it makes stressful events or the overwhelm of a busy schedule a little less daunting because you know a break is coming soon.
For a lot of us, social media has become a part of our daily lives. It’s how we keep up with friends and family, it’s where we go for news and updates, and where we learn cool tips and about useful products that can help us.
But social media tends to lead us down a path of constantly comparing ourselves to others and most of the time we do not feel like we measure up; which can lead to anxiety and depression.
The reality is that everything you see online is the ‘highlight reel’ of other people’s lives. People only share the good parts, but they really have all the same problems as the rest of us. We may know this but it’s still hard to resolve that in our minds when we are bombarded with all the good, and don’t see the struggles.
The thought of giving up social media altogether may also cause negative feelings because you don’t want to be cut off from others or miss out on the positive things that social media does have to offer. So a good solution may be to take social media breaks.
You can do this in a variety of ways.
In her TED Talk, ‘Is Social Media Hurting Your Mental Health?’ Bailey Parnell, shares that “numerous studies from the US, Canada, the UK…have linked high social media use with high levels of anxiety and depression”. You can watch the video HERE of her entire TED Talk, to hear more details about how social media can have a negative impact on your mental health. (TEDx Talks; Is Social Media Hurting Your Mental Health? | Bailey Parnell | TEDxRyersonU; June 22, 2017; Youtube.com)
Spending less time on social media, or taking periodic breaks, will allow you to separate yourself from the constant comparison and idea that you don’t measure up to what you see online.
You started in therapy. That’s a huge step. A step that took thought, research, and time. Now, you may be asking, “Am I getting what I need from therapy?”. This will be an important question to ask yourself to make sure you are benefiting. Reasons …
Therapy is a great place to start to get support. Having someone who can help you evaluate, organize and cope with the struggles you and/or your family are facing can initiate necessary change and healing. And, at some point your therapist may determine that another …
It’s easy to get overwhelmed when you are taking the first steps to begin therapy. You might be wondering if now is the right time to start therapy; or you may have already made the decision to move forward with therapy but are not sure how to find the right therapist for you.
It’s true that there are a lot of options and a lot of things to consider when you are finding a therapist.
Let’s look at 3 areas you can address to find the right therapist and achieve the results you desire.
We all go through hard times and it can be easy to chalk them up to normal life stressors; but when is it more than normal stress? We all have a threshold of distress and it is different for everyone. Your threshold may be higher than the threshold of your family and friends, and only you know when you have met it.
How will you know you met that threshold? Maybe your emotions are getting the best of you on a regular basis. Maybe you are turning to unhealthy coping skills such as drinking or overeating. Or maybe you always feel uncomfortable, find yourself in the same patterns or struggles with your loved ones and like you have nowhere else to turn.
These might be reasons to take that first step towards therapy. Talking with someone can help you deal with your emotions and find ways to manage stressors that work for you.
There are also times in your life that you will have to deal with major life events that can be overwhelming. These events might require extra support and guidance from a professional because you’ve never had to deal with similar situations.
The impact of major life events are sometimes beyond what your normal support system can help you through.
If you are looking for more information on beginning therapy you can check one of our previous posts HERE where we discussed when it’s time to go to therapy and how to get the most out of it.
There are directories online that you can use to search for a therapist like psychology.com and psychologytoday.com. These sites make it easy to search, filter and refine results based on your specific needs.
These directories can also tell you if the therapist accepts insurance or not. You may not have thought about whether or not you will be using your insurance for therapy but it’s important to research and consider all your options.
There are pros and cons to using your insurance for therapy so it’s important to consider them all and make the best decision for you. Let’s talk about a few things to consider.
A therapist who accepts insurance may be overwhelmed with referrals and it may take months to get an appointment. If it took you a while to take that first step towards therapy, waiting several months for an appointment may cause you to lose the momentum you built up to take that step.
A therapist who takes insurance may be a more affordable option for ongoing care but it still pays to ask what the charge will be if they don’t accept your insurance just in case your insurance changes.
In turn, you may be more likely to reach your goals if you are paying out of pocket because, as humans, we are more committed when we have invested something.
If you want to use your insurance you can do a search for a therapist in your area and cross reference with Psychology Today profile using the filters to search. You can also pick a few names from the list of therapists your insurance provides and search them on Google to see if they have a website.
It is not uncommon for therapists who primarily work with insurance not to have a website, so don’t be discouraged by that. However, it’s helpful to look and see if there is any additional information online so you can get a sense of fit so you are not just picking from a list of names.
Consider the level of investment, on all levels, and then move forward with finding a therapist that is a good match for you.
When you are searching for a therapist you want to look for one that aligns with your beliefs/philosophy on life, feels relatable to you and has experience helping people with the issue that prompted you to begin looking for a therapist.
Going to therapy can be intimidating because you will be talking about things that are uncomfortable to talk about. If you find someone that you feel comfortable with you will be more likely to open up about those things and get to the root of the issues you are facing. Your relationship with your therapist can play a big role in whether or not you see the results you desire.
Think about your preferences. Will you feel more comfortable with a male or a female? Do you want to work with someone who is older than you or are you okay with someone who is younger? Is it important to you that your therapist has certain religious beliefs? These are all things to consider when looking for a therapist.
If you are struggling with a specific issue you may want to search for a therapist that specializes in that area. Some may focus on anxiety or depression, or even a specific age group. This may help you narrow down your search and help you find the therapist that is right for you.
If you have questions about finding a therapist that is right for you, or you are ready to take the first step and begin therapy contact us and we will be happy to help!